Growing Up Like Grandma

I still remember one of my favorite routines with my 97-year-old grandmother in the year before she died. We had a regular ritual for greeting the new day. First—for dignity—I would bring my gram her freshly polished teeth. Second—so I didn’t have to yell—I would hand over the hearing aids. Then, I would give her glasses to her so she could see how she lit up my eyes. Once she was put back together it was time to get out of bed. Such a precious routine!

My grandmother was 50 years older than me. Over the years I admired how well she took care of herself and took part in life. Ever since I was little, I wanted to grow up like Grandma. I’m sharing with you a post from my blog on aging well that I wrote when she died. It’s called…

Growing Up Like Grandma

My sisters have hinted more than once that I must have “come from the milkman.” Not because of my creamy complexion (I wish!), or my knack for guzzling plain, nonfat yogurt, but because I look nothing like them. I’m the only one with brown eyes, straight curves and small teats. And though I’m pretty sure the milkman wasn’t involved, I hope it’s more because I take after my grandma.

My grandma lived to be a 97-year-old ever-ready bunny. She was truly built to last (and it had nothing to do with the batteries she used). Her longevity was partly due to her stout German genes, but mostly because of the way she lived. Grandma was a stickler for routine, and her everyday habits served her well. Even with over nine and a half decades under her belt, she was still able to drive, cook, volunteer and tie her own shoes.

Some of the practices that kept my grandmother young and lively were:

Spending a good portion of her day in the yard & garden.
Preparing well-balanced meals with lots of fruits & vegetables (from her garden).
Saying grace before each meal.
Finishing her lunch with a cup of hot tea (usually green tea) and just a bite of something sweet.
Maintaining her ideal weight.
Getting enough rest.
Taking care of others.
Always being content with herself and having many interests like reading, playing cards, watching the SF Giants and volunteering in her community.
Keeping her house organized and orderly.
And no matter what happened, she always began and ended her day with gratitude and prayers.

I remember talking to Grandma about getting older and she told me that she didn’t start feeling old until she was in her late eighties. Wow! I hope I can live to say the same. Of course, I’ll still go out with a wet head and run a little more than she thought I should, but I promise to practice more of her routine and hopefully I’ll grow up just like Grandma.

When my grandmother died it was a sad time for me and my family—not just mourning the loss of her precious presence, but the loss of a whole generation. She was the last one.

Fortunately, I had the chance to tell my grandma how much I loved her—one of the perks of having “nine lives.” The summer before her death, when I mistakenly thought her time was near, I wrote her a letter so that she could know how much she was loved. It’s very personal, but I wanted to share it with you because it exemplifies a life well lived. May we all live as long and as well as my grandmother.

Dearest Grandma,

You have been such a blessing in my life, and you have a very special place in my heart. You are loved more than you know—not just by me, but your whole family, from your daughter and her husband to their children and offspring, from your youngest brother to your great, great nieces and nephews. And you are dearly loved by all your lifelong friends. I thought it would be nice to tell you what it is about you that makes you so loved.

First and foremost, it is your love and devotion to God. How you live shows us all that Life is a prayer. You have always been in awe & wonder of Creation, and grateful for each and every blessing. Your faith is unfaltering and it fills you with peace and grace.

Secondly, it is your love for your family. You have been a mighty matriarch. By your example, we have learned the values of integrity, honor, reverence, generosity, humility and dignity. You have taught us how important family is and how to care for each other with love and respect. You have supported us in every way possible, and our lives are better from your guidance and prayers. You truly have lived your calling to be “matriarchal mortar” serving as a foundation & fountain of love.

Thirdly, it is your love for others and your community. You have spent your entire life serving and taking care of others. You have been a devout caretaker for anyone in need. Even now, when it’s harder for you to get around, you’re still visiting the sick, driving friends to church, attending community meetings, and at times taking care of your own caregiver! Your concern for others has been constant & ever present.

Grandma, you and I share so much in common and this has deepened our mutual love and admiration over the years… our love for nature & God’s bountiful beauty; how we both treat our bodies as temples—nourishing them, honoring them, trusting them, and being grateful for how they serve us; our love of home—creating a safe haven that comforts us, welcomes others, and surrounds us with beauty & order; understanding the importance of honoring tradition & principles; our love of baking, gardening, flower arranging, and serving up family dinners … these are just a few, but our deepest bond is our faith. And, though we each see God a little differently, our devotion is the same.

I want you to know that I carry you with me always. You are a piece of my heart forever. Thank you for all your love, all your support, and all your prayers, for all of my life.